Dear
Mon cher
Monsieur
Madame
Listen
Yo
you really are a
you
you remind me of a
you are nothing but a
you stink more than a
dirty
farting
fat-assed
flatulent
totally idiotic
post-imperialistic
pathetic
putrescent
totally insignificant
communist
democrat
republican
gay poodle owner
half baked croissant
cheeseburger eater
monkey lover
weasel
hairdresser
leaking pustule
wedding singer
retarded cheerleader
strategy consultant
Lumberg wannabe
hopeless dope
non-speaking role
chemical incident
back seat mistake
schmuck
I really wished I could
next time I can, I will
you make me want to
I feel an urge to
I cant wait to
even your dog should
I heard your landlord likes to
every poodle in France should
I shall write the IRS to
you only deserve that I
I'm pretty sure I could
So help me god, I'm going to
brutally
cruelly
obnoxiously
maliciously
mercylessly
violently
recklessly
carefully
deliberately
enthusiastically
frantically
nonchalantly
rudely
force
shove
insert
slap
stuff
throw
pile
ram
rub
feed
smear
a hundred liters of
ten kilos of
your Mamma's weight in
copious amounts of
a years's worth of
all of France's yearly production of
a box of
a boatload of
French dressing
Bordeau wine
assorted French cheese
furry Eiffel towers
nuclear waste
smelly armpits
soggy croissants
curly pubic hair
Parisian poodle poo
French onion soup
French phonebooks
church bells
sharp cutlery
disseased chickens
French Grey Poupon mustard
French toast
unprocessed goat kidneys
French berrets
rotten chocolat mousse
grumpy Parisians
weapons of mass destruction
TPS reports
inside your
deep inside your
right into your
on your
up your
around your
onto your
artificial anus
oversized hairy nostrils
grottesque furry ears
mother's refrigerator
purrulent mouth
every available orifice
pathetic haircut
most expensive tuxedo pockets
morning coffe
next date's underwear
miserable face
birthday cake
Your Name:
Your Email:
How do you relate to the recipient?
twin souls
best friends
mortal enemies
totally indifferent to each other
occasionnal sex partners
each other's nightmare
share the same girlfriend
share the same boyfriend
share his wife (without him knowing)
wear the same tie, yours looks better
You are sending this E-Card because he/she:
is the love of your life
really smells like rotten fish
does not deserve better
is totally pathetic
has the worst haicut since ABBA
is depriving a village of its idiot
should sue brain for non-support
should check if parents are siblings
profund enough to be a perfect cavity
needs no extra makeup for Halloween
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Signature
Recipient Name
Recipient email
Should the e-card have sound?
No
La Marseillaise
The Monthy Python
(better than the french)
The Pink Panther
Ferris Bueller's day off
(Pardon my French)